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So I have not posted anything here in like over a year, the roller coaster year is however coming to an end and if I did not do this ……….. I was going through twitter recently and saw different links to different posts by peeps about how 2013 turned out for them.

2013 was the best and worst year I have ever had in my 20 something years on mother earth. I am not a good writer so pardon my shortcomings if you ever get to read this post.


It started out good, I had offended my boss a few days back by taking an undeserved holiday which he did not find funny but he got over it after I apologized. I practically slept all day on the 1st January, partly because I felt sick and partly cos I felt I was pregnant. I had seen the doctor earlier and he said I was not so I was not too sure.

2nd was resumption date and even though I was not healthy¬† enough I dragged myself to work, made amends and all was fine with the world or so I thought……… My birthday came and it was fabulous, had a splendid time and boss even dashed me money, boy! everyone was surprised, even me.

As the month dragged to an end, I was more weak and also confirmed the pregnancy scare, the roller coaster ride began, I asked for time off work cos I could not cope. Kept thinking of the 9 long months, too sad I didn’t appreciate what God had done for me.


I was still sick or so I refer to the morning sickness as, retired to spend time with my mum so she could take care of me, vals day was a blur, I am not even sure of what happened but I know it came and went its way. Still did not take time to appreciate what God had done for me, I was scared it was not what I wanted and not the right time because I had started considering my masters’ degree program then. This was going to put a stop to it, besides there were too many what ifs I considered, what if I didn’t make it through, but God remained faithful.


The morning sickness got worse, boo was not helping matters, kinda regretted getting pregnant at that point, tried pushing it behind but my life was on hold, tried praying but couldn’t figure out the right words to say, then the scary dreams started, I tried to be closer to God but that was all it was…. trial but I did not succeed in the quest.


The experience was more harrowing I wished I could do something about it, had to put up a facade, smiled all day long even when I was dying inside, went ahead to fill out the form for the masters’ degree, planned to get away from everything I knew after the delivery, I had plans but man proposes, God disposes, kept smiling through it all, by then I started to listen to more worship songs it kinda helped in lifting my spirit.


Had pains all over, the doctor said I was just experiencing body changes, I had to pretend I was fine because I did not want my mum feeling like there was a problem but I knew there was, the nightmares were still there though I kind of conquered at the end of every episode or so I could call it, the doctor said my child was cute when she felt her and I joked about having a smooth delivery because she wont be too big.


Boo came visiting, we had a good time, I had no idea the month was going to be the worst month ever, I only knew I had a serious unrest in my spirit, I prayed and this time I prayed hard, came back to Lagos to deliver a ‘consignment’ and then the bleeding started, :(, tried all means to stop this, doctor said it was false labor and then the contractions started, ended up in LUTH and I delivered a beautiful baby girl who lived only for 4 days, those days were the worst days ever, heard all sorts from doctors that been a pre-term baby there were lots of risks involved if she survived.

I prayed and had faith like never before, I believed she was going to survive and that she will turn out fine, I was so wrong, she struggled to survive and it made me weak, I wished I could take all the pains away and make the world a better place, I could only cry and pray.

And the morning came, she passed away and rested. I miss you OLUWAJOMILOJU BODUNRIN and even though I did not love you enough while I was pregnant with you, I did when I set my eyes on you, keep resting in God’s bosom.

July & August

I lost faith in God and in everything, started living my life like it came, I was not bothered about anything, I got drunk a lot though in the corner of my room, I said Amen to prayers people said but it was just lip service, I did not believe in it. I felt wasted.


I got another job, but did not resume, I felt I was not mentally ready and I did not even want anything near my profession, and then the reality hit me that while I had an opportunity that i was misusing, some were looking for same and I decided to pay my new boss a visit to apologize with a promise that I was going to start the following month.

October & November

Started work, met new people, had a sense of fulfillment, I could visibly see God’s hands in everything I laid my hands on and even though I didn’t acknowledge this, in spite of my unfaithfulness, he remained faithful.


Work is more fulfilling, I find myself telling friends that I enjoy litigation now, God saw me through the pains of 2013, I apologize for ever failing him and I pray the new year will be the best of years to come.

Thank you friends who made 2013 bearable, and thank you mum for being a solid rock behind me, thank you boo for everything, my sister, I love you greatly, thank you for standing by me in the trying times, my siblings, I am grateful for having you guys, Oluwanifemi, you rock my world, like I practically look forward to everyday because of you.

Thank you.


So how has life been generally? He asked again sensing she didn’t hear the first time, and also wondered what could be on her mind that she was so carried away; life’s been good but you know like they say, life in itself is not always fair.

That’s correct but i must say, life has also dealt me with my fair share before getting to this stage and life goes on you know, who knows what tomorrow will bring, we can only hope for the best. So i’m sure your boyfriend or fiance must be a very jealous one, you don’t let your guards down easily and that got me thinking that it must be because of him but on second thought, you’ve also got standards and maybe i dont fit into such.

Daniella smiled genuinely for the first time since her encounter with the devil sitted across to her from the table, maybe it’s the standard, she replied. That’s really cool then i suppose but you should learn to have fun once in a while. Thank you so much, if you don’t mind i have to get back to work.

Yes he exclaimed, thanks for honouring the date, uuhhnn, she said, i meant coming out with me for lunch, i appreciate it. Arthur, can i ask you for something, since he had requested that they relate on first name basis, yes go ahead; could you get someone else to stand in for me at your dinner, i have a 5 year old son to take care of after work.

He sighed, he wasn’t going to let go easily, he also had a son too, what a coincidence, all i need is your address, i will personally pick you up at 7pm with your son and he could hang out with mine , i’ve a baby sitter who will take care of them; it was her turn to sigh, at least he had a son and probably a wife somewhere but why result to giving your child care thorugh a baby sitter and not his mother, she thought; as if reading her thoughts, he said, his mum is late, im very sorry about that, she replied sharply. Shall we? the address; i’ll send it by sms before the end of the day.

She then decided to pick a dress she had been eyeing in a boutique close to her house the following day, she loved it, the sharp color, the cut and every thing about i
It, she was sure it will be her perfect size. And yes, she was going to make a statement with her looks for once; she smiled remembering the rumours been carried on around the office as to how she was an unhappy old baggage and how she wouldn’t look any different even if she was clothed by Prada.

They were in for a shock!

Hi everyone!

Hi everyone, I’m new here but I’ll like to try my hands on something too, might be a bit ridiculous at first but I hope to get better with time, my post from tomorrow will be tagged, ‘the shape of things to come’, its some kinda story that’s been on my mind for a while but I’ve been busy wiv oda things. Your encouragements will be helpful though, thanks.


The last thing on my mind that morning was finding love in the most unexpected place.
Seun had come around for his birthday and the whole week had been full of activities which I enjoyed though, but it was also tiring, he always wanted to hang out, have fun without thinking I might want to rest, but can you blame a 2year old.
He means the world to me in more ways than one and trust me, laying my life down for him is an understatement considering how I feel about him.
Yawning lazily as I got into my room, I sprawled on the bed, a break from all the stress, Seun had gone back to his grandma’s so I could at least get some rest, I decided to check my facebook post and right before my eyes, his message popped up and I couldn’t help but smile, yes I must admit he always made me smile.
Not that I’m promiscuous or into men but when it comes to him, things had always been different, he requested that I send him a message which I did without hesitation and bam he called back.
He wanted to know how I had been, wanted to see me and when he realized I was avoiding him, he broke it down, he wants me back!
I couldn’t help but laugh even though I knew he’s serious. I told him let’s see how it goes but I had a gut feeling that I wasn’t serious about this and instead I should just let him know but I wanted to revel and bask in the euphoria of being wanted by ‘him’.
I’m still smiling now, one week down the line n I’m sure I want to make this work.